Building New Wings

This has been a year of reinvention for me, of dreaming up a new dream. I feel like at sometime or another, each one of us is faced with the reality that what we imagined in our head to happen in our lives is not going to happen. It is then that we can either wade in the floods of our disappointment or take flight in the joy of our new dreams.

Unfortunately, a downside of my job is the tearing down of students' dreams. Time and again, I am forced to give someone the reality that what they had envisioned for their lives is simply not feasible. Either to lack of planning on their part or sheer ignorance, they were simply unaware and unprepared for the reality that they will not be spending their young and exciting years at the college of their choice. 

There, in that moment of devastation, is the chance to build anew. Can't afford school? Maybe take a year off and travel. Or start working at a non-profit. Get some perspective and try again next year. Or maybe find that this dream was not what you wanted at all and learn to enjoy a new one. This is what I want to tell people. Tell them that they may have just been released into the wild, but it might be the best adventure of their lives.

Via Pinterest

And that is what I have been doing. Growing up, I always wanted to be a mommy. Wanted to have little ones surrounding me and nurturing them like an earth-mama. Then, as I got older, I started to see what other things I wanted in life first. Like to travel the world. Enjoy a good couple years of marriage. Make enough money to buy my first new car and have a decent wardrobe. Go on a backpacking trip that I had been putting off all throughout college.

Via southerlywayfarer

Then came the shattering. It was just a faint plus sign on a stick, but it was enough to make my whole world come tumbling down. It was then that the Lord was whispering to me, "It's time to dream a new dream."

Our First Picture of Baby

And so I have. I have been holding on to the precious moments with my husband that will soon be few and far between. I am savoring the lingering baths and last minute trips, knowing that those will be a thing of the past in just a few short months. But I have also been saving up new little dreams in my heart. Like the thought of holding my son close for the first time. Or showing him the wonder of the outdoors. In the quietness at the dinner table, I imagine how joyous and loud it will soon be. I think of watching this little being grow into a man with thoughts and opinions of his own. 

Via woodennest

I look down at my belly and watch the kicking and squirming, watch as life is unfolding inside, and I know, HE is my new dream.

And maybe it was the better dream to have all along.

Restless Hearts

I have to admit, I have been putting off writing anything on here. Not just here, but anything in general. What can I possibly say that is worth telling everyone? 

Yet, insomnia is a powerful thing. As my legs restlessly remind me of the sleepless nights that will be lying ahead of me, my heart is restless as well. Restless to share and be creative again.

Via freepeople

When I was in college, a roommate and I were determined to use up the creative energy that we were not expending in our studies. She made beautiful works of art and I was incredibly jealous of how she could show her creativity with ease. I cannot create art to save my life. I once drew some impress kung-fo fighting stick figures, but that is where my talent ends. I had to find my own outlet for creativity.

I have found, though, deep down in my heart, that creativity is an incurable itch. I can ignore it for days, weeks, and even sometimes a month at a time. At the end of the day, though, it will come exploding out of me in poorly strung-together verses, and ridiculous DIY- projects that never turn out as great as the pictures promise. It comes out in overly-ambitious recipes that take me hours longer than I thought and leaves my poor husband starving for most of the night.

Via knuckleballerr

Most of all it invariably, and best, comes out in writing. I find peace in letting words flow off of a page and the itch is satisfied for a time. And I came to understand that creativity is not locked down to one art form and it is a necessity for every person in life. I have had people tell me that they are not creative, then go on to perfectly design and decorate a room where I could only see four walls and a floor, deliver a moving speech, or make the most amazing chocolate chip cookie.

Being creative is relieving that restlessness in your heart and making something come alive.

Via ohhellofriend

Where is your heart restless today? What is in need of your creative touch?