One year since I gave birth to my son.
One year since I moved away from everything I have ever known.
One year since my life has been completely turned upside-down.
Last week we moved from our house to an apartment across the street. Nothing like renting a home makes you want to own your own home and we decided to cut the fat out of the budget to start making that a possibility. I was surprised how emotional it was for me. I had told myself all along that the house we were in was not our house. No point in overhauling the yard, painting the walls, hanging up photos, or thinking too deeply about color schemes. It was just a temporary space, yet somehow it creeped into my heart.
It was the house that Ben said his first words and took his first step in. It was the house that I learned independence and changed in so many unimaginable ways. Leaving it felt like leaving a piece of myself and it hurt to think that such an important place will only be a memory.
Leaving our first home
It was a needed rending, though, and it helped to physically move in order to push me to mentally, emotionally, and physically move. The past year has been a year of healing. I was able to slowly recover from the stress, anxiety, poor nutrition, and insecurity that I had inflicted on myself the previous 25 years. It was absolutely necessary and I have come out on the other side of 26 a more whole, enthusiastic and energetic person.
Now it is time to step outside my comfort zones and this coming year is a challenge to start living my life outside of myself and my small family. It is time to make friends, go on adventures, experience new places, start working and start giving again. I won't say that it is time to start living my life because the rest from last year was needed in order to dig into the depths of myself and live more fully.
However, I will say that it is time to live my life out loud. I am looking forward to the challenges and joys waiting for me. It will be stretching, exhausting, and exhilarating all at the same time.
27, I am ready. Let's do this thing.
